by John Ganshaw
Leave All Behind
There you stood staring into the mirror thinking you were alone, but you weren’t,
I was standing before you, peering through the window, seeing your
pain and hurt. I witnessed everything that you tried to hide. I was the one
who suffered with you, but only watching and never helping. Frozen in
time and unable to speak, Screams of torment released only the silence
of despair and shame. The beatings you carried have lived for years,
each that healed on your skin shall forever live in the memory of my mind.
I feel each strike as I look back through the minefield of time. So many paths
have been beaten down but I still return to you. Each night you cried
I pulled back the curtains and shed them too. I felt you shaking through the
night though you never felt my grasp as I wished to hold you tight. I saw all
your accomplishments when others didn’t give a glance. I treasured all that
you would become when others kept burying you. Through all these years I’ve
shed a thousand tears for each that flowed down your cheeks. I knew your dreams
and plan to escape. I lived my life for all your dreams, all your hopes, and all
your wishes. I know all you sacrificed for the love of others. I close my
eyes and still see the shyness and fear. I see the love for others and
your strength to not give in. The will to fight for what you believe. All that
happened was locked away. Now, the key to that passage has been found.
That door is wide open and no need to fear. I’ve come back to take you
to a better land. The darkness of the past has turned to light. Take my hand
and hold it tight so we can finally be together for the rest of our lives.
Truth in Time
They take advantage of all your life
some for sex, others for money
some wanted both
some lovers, some friends, some for prey
where is the family?
see your compassion, see you care
they just want what they think is theirs
the hurt is caused and the pain inflicted
you are numb and close your eyes
Tell yourself it’s all ok,
by now you know how to get by
lock it away behind the doors in your mind
hide behind the smiles you share
let them see, you know the facade
the truth is yours to keep
in the end, no one understands
you alone can feel the pain
the sun will rise and it will set
that is all that matters in the end
in time all will be known
how much you give but never take
they will get all they want
tired now no need to fight
maybe it will cease someday
perhaps in time, you can tell
Smiles Run Deep
See his smile that goes a mile or so wide
Oh, the happiness that this wearer must bring
this gift of love and life light up the sky
this joy must originate from the depths inside
it radiates such beauty and grace for all to see
capture and admire what the outside appears to be
he lets us relish in his facade from afar
keeps hidden the pain, stored in bottles at a bar
the sadness that lives is kept hidden from view
we are mesmerized by his muscles to peruse
in awe of his prowess and athletic brawn
unaware of the despair that he longs to be gone
the outside view is enough for us to judge, yet
haven’t a clue, or care, who he is
make up a story that suits our needs
how content and jubilant this young man must be
unknowing that within he cries and no one cares
his monsters and demons lurk in the shadows there
he battles those foes every day, that smile of his
is always just an arm's reach away
we dream how lucky he must be, to flash
those pearly whites for all to see. how fortunate
and blessed this young god must be
unaware of his emptiness that’s kept buried so deep
we view what we want and nothing more
no need to see all he keeps underneath
how sad for us, we will never know
that smile we see is just our need
to hide the truth that lies beneath.
and in death, few will weep